Thursday, December 27, 2007

Smiling At The Storm

With Christ in the vessel, we can smile at the storm

Smile at the storm, smile at the storm...


It's amazing how a Sunday school song can have such profound words.
As I was reflecting a few days back, I realise that I've been singing those lyrics happily since the recent YISS without pausing to ponder what it is I'm actually singing.

Can I really smile when the storms of life come rocking the boat?

If I remember correctly, the apostles were not smiling that fateful night when sudden gales transformed a tranquil voyage across the lake into a life or death struggle to keep their vessel afloat.
With powerful waves slamming onto their boat and the rain hammering their bodies, the Twelve were not smiling at all... No, they were terrified. Scared out of their minds.


The storms we face today in Singapore are not so literal, but can be just as terrifying.
Death of a loved one, parents getting divorced, friendships turned sour... The list goes on and on.
In my case, being jobless for a few months is starting to bug me.

Lately I've been feeling the waves of doubt assailing my mind.
Will I ever find a suitable job?
Will anyone ever want to employ me?
How come I'm still not sure what I want to pursue?

The chilling winds of fear can dampen my spirit at times.
What's the point of sending all those resumes if no one is going to respond?
Should I be keeping my hopes up for this particular job?
What if I blow the interview for a job I really like?

But still the Word of the Lord remains... Trust.

All it took from Jesus to calm the storm was a simple command.
At His Word, the winds were silenced, the rain ceased, and the waves lost their might.
It was that simple for the Son of God, hardly broke a sweat going up against the forces of Nature. He did create them, didn't He?

But it takes great faith to wait for His timing in the midst of life's storms.
When nothing seems certain, it takes a man of great trust in the Lord to smile at the storm.
I cannot always be that man... I falter and I become afraid when I look at my situation.


You know what I imagine when I think of what it's like to smile at the storm?

The fearless Spartan warriors of '3oo', standing side by side with shields up and spears raised against the advancing Persian legions. They knew it was about to get nasty, that they may not make it out alive, but they were smiling. Confident. Trusting in their skills and those of their fellow soldiers.




Lord, I know You have called me to stand as Your warrior.
But I do fear, Lord, as I face the uncertainty of my future.
Help me to trust in You... Help me to always cling to You, even as the storm rages around me.
I want to look my troubles in the face confidently, and sing....

With Christ in my vessel, I can smile at the storm...

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Flashback

My birthday wish 2 years ago:

Lord, I have not really known you these past 25 years.
So for the next 25 years and beyond...
Take my life and make it Yours.

Got a feeling Abba's not done granting me that wish yet...
Ha ha

Guess that's what happens after Jesus rescued me.
I was left wondering how could I ever have lived my life without wanting Him by my side...
Such a foolish notion.
What's left to do is, well, to make up for lost time... For all those times I did not even try to follow Him.

Jesus, You Be Lifted High...

Cupcakes & Chocolate Cakes

Had 3 cakes yesterday.

To mark the end of my 26th year on earth.


I love the cupcake from Becky...
It may be small in size, but I loved every bite. Really was a very sweet thing to do, literally and figuratively speaking... haha

The next cake caught this jaded birthday celebrant offguard.
A meeting room at St. Joseph's Church priests' house was a rather offbeat venue to be celebrating someone's birthday.
But hey, the thought really counts... A big thanks to my sister Elaine for that.

I shared the third cake with Amplify's December babies.
Didn't really wanna go up there, since I'm just a guest in their house.
But well, the crowd had spoken.... And I do appreciate everyone praying for me la... haha
It's good to be welcomed in a community.


For me, it's the fact that someone remembers which warms my heart.
To be remembered, is really a great thing in a life that's like a flower quickly fading.
And to have someone remember one's birthday, is one of God's little ways of reminding me...
That I am special and dearly loved in His eyes, especially in this day when He fondly remembers the moment when He brought me into this world.


I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean, like vapour in the wind
Still You hear me when I'm calling
You catch me when I'm falling
You told me who I am
I am Yours
-- from "Who Am I" by Casting Crowns

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Be Lifted High


I fall to my knees,

So it's You that they see,

Not I,

Jesus, You be lifted high...


These are lyrics from Leeland's Be Lifted High.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSg8n2JSL8k

Word from the heart of a worshiper.
Words that leave an impression in me.
Sometimes it's too easy to receive compliments and affirmations, then forget to direct them to the One whom all glory and praise belong to.

Jesus, let this be my heartsong to you...
As I continue to lead your people in worship.
Let me alwasy point them to You, my King.
Let them look at You, Lord... and not me.. never me.

Jesus, You Be Lifted High...
I love long bus rides.
Though it can get a pain in the ass sometimes (literally), I enjoy the time I have to myself... To listen to praise & worship music, or to be lost in reflection.

There can be so many things to do on any given day, that sometimes I forget to take the time to think... to reflect... That only when I have to sit in a bus, with no one to talk to and nothing to do but sit still, is when I spend that time with inner self... and with my God.

I was on one such bus ride today, from Bishan to airport to welcome some visiting relatives.
My mind drifted to my job search, my ministry, and the people I am journeying with.
I am feeling a little bit tired.
For all the progress and growth I'm blessed with this year, I find myself wanting to catch a breather as 2007 draws to a close.
Sharing in a person's life can be a pretty absorbing task. It's easy to find oneself drawn into another's life situations and burdens... Problems that one finds oneself unequipped to handle.
Words fail... or sometimes they seem too cheap to say.

Lord... How can I do this? How can I keep running the race with these people when I don't know where they could be headed?
There again the Lord reminded me of the answer... That I don't need to have it.
What I have to do, is to ask Him.
Ask Him to show me His vision for the people I'm walking with.
Pray for them, and surrender them to Him... For they are God's children, not mine.
I'm just an instrument.

The burden is not mine to carry... it is Jesus'.
With that realisation comes a relief, a sense of peace... My friends are in God's hands, just as I am. It brings a willing surrender... a welcome sense of need I feel for my Lord.

His yoke is easy, His burden is light.
He's full of wisdom, power and might.

Lord, this is a declaration of dependence.
Jesus, I need You...
Jesus, I want You...

I am... Captivated.

Thursday, December 13, 2007


"I've been dreaming of a true love's kiss..."

Yep... I watched Disney's Enchanted yesterday and I can't quite get that tune out of my head now.

I'm not what you would call a hopeless romantic...
Marriage is an effort. You gotta make it work. It's easy to fall out of love, the challenge is to stay in love. Etc. Etc. ....

But wouldn't it be nice to believe in the fairytale happily ever after romance?
Especially in a world where divorce rates are at an alarmingly high percentage, where Adam often ends up with Steve.

The fact is, there is just something about love.
That makes every joe into a hero. That stirs up a whimsy in the most stern faces.
There is something magical about love.
It makes us believe in magic carpet rides.. knights in shining armour.. a beauty in the castle tower.

Perhaps that is why God is so intoxicating... A being of pure, unconditional Love.
There is nothing quite like the presence of Abba in a room... A gentle reassuring Love that opens up the floodgates of the heart and brings you to your knees in sweet surrender.

Perhaps that is how Christ found the strength to embrace the Cross at the Via Dolorosa... Love kept Him going. At those agonising moments, He saw the faces of each and every one of us and He remembered how madly in love He is... and He picked Himself up from the dirt.

The Romans were amazed at how this fool clings feverishly to the instrument of His doom...
They did not understand Love...

So Pilate asked, "What is Truth?"
He did not understand Love...

For Love is the Truth...
That God so loves the world He sent His One and Only Son, so that those who believe in Him may not perish but have life eternal.

I guess God put that love in each one of us, so we may have an inkling of the mystery of the Passion. What made the Son of God willingly take the punishment that should have been borne by us.
Love enables us to become Alter Christus... the Other Christ... To love another human being more than we care for ourselves.

When a man and a woman unite in matrimony, they experience a glimmer of the intimacy shared by the Trinity. A union of heart, body and soul.

So yeah... maybe I have been dreaming of a "true love's kiss", and the princess I'm hoping comes with this.
Ha ha.. Funny how it takes a movie to bring out what a recollection at the Seminary could not quite pinpoint.

But hey, you know what... First and foremost, Lord, my life is Yours.
And this remains my heart's one desire... To be set apart for You, my Master, ready to do Your will.
For I believe I have experienced true love, and it's only gonna get much better as I continue to run after my Saviour King... Ha ha... Yeah, it's official; I'm crazy for this Guy! =)

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

Who Killed Jesus Christ?

Probably a very odd question to ask.

And so very easy to come up with culprits from the top of our heads...

Pilate, the Pharisees, the ignorant Jews, the Roman soldiers, Judas Iscariot...

But the real answer might be even closer to home than you might think...


Check out the article (posted on 26 Nov 2007) on the following blog:
http://www.ylm-ctk.blogspot.com/

So who was responsible for the one of the most heinous acts of crime ever committed in the history of mankind?


The conclusion may shock you...




Yup... The painful but very real truth...


I killed Jesus Christ.

You killed Jesus Christ.

We all killed Jesus Christ.


But God demonstrates his own love for us in this:
While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
--Romans 5:8

Monday, November 5, 2007

The Journey Continues...

I've been silent on this blog lately.

But that doesn't mean God has been silent in my life.

Far from that...

My journey with Him continues; for He has answered a pretty long standing question...

"A disciple is one who devotes his entire life to becoming like his rabbi... To be able to do what his rabbi does."

And my rabbi is Christ...

Which means I got a lot to learn, and it may well literally take my entire life to be like this Guy!
=)

But as He said, "Those who put their hand on the yoke and look back, are not worthy of the Kingdom of God."

So Lord, lead the way..


Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Prayers That Move Mountains

I had this conversation with God not too long ago....

Me : Lord, what should I share with my Cell this weekend?

God : Share with them about the kind of prayer that moves mountains.

Me : Hmm.. Then You gotta tell me what to say. I'm not sure if I've prayed the kind of prayer that moves mountains...

God : The kind of prayer that moves mountains, is the prayer of little children.




Have you seen the way a child begs his dad for a toy at the department store?
He simply points at the toy and says, "Daddy, I want."
He has full faith that daddy can give him the toy, so he asks, never worrying about whether or not he's been a good boy this month, or if he's done well in school recently, etc.
And he never stops asking til daddy gives in... That's persistency.

I was reminded of this conversation on Sunday at the adoration room.

Most people would pick a spot at the back of the room, shuffle around a bit to find a comfortable position, maybe reply a few SMS first, take out rosary to pray or take out Bible to read and a dozen other things that people normally do when they go to adoration room.

But not this little girl I saw that day.

She walked in, went right up to the Blessed Sacrament, knelt down and kept quiet.
Like Mary of Bethany, she had chosen the best part; To sit at the feet of Jesus, and no one can take that away from her.

Such was the faith of a little child.

After a while, she stood and went out with her mom (who was seated somewhere at the back of the room, by the way).

I bet whatever she asked for was already done for her by our Father in Heaven.




Monday, October 22, 2007

A Day At The Fair

Went to the JobsCentral Career Fair at Suntec Convention Center yesterday.



So exciting... colourful exhibitions, people mingling, filling up forms, having conversations... there was just so much life there.

And here I was afraid that I would be pushed & shoved in a huge, unpleasant crowd... haha... I guess Abba proved me wrong =)

I had great company too lah...
So blessed to have siblings in Christ like Eugene, Jane, Nat, Krish & Angele who would spend their Sunday afternoon milling around Exhibition Hall 404 with me even though they're not really searching for anything in particular.
Thanks for the awesome company, guys & girls... You really made my day.

For the first time in two months, I'm excited about the prospect of entering the working world once again. So many possibilities, a variety of career paths to choose from... Should I stick with my engineering education, or should I explore something else?
I wonder what kind of door Daddy would open for me?
Haha.. maybe I'm like a kid anticipating a present from his father. But hey, my Dad is the King of All Creation after all... =)

Yesterday was also World Mission Sunday.
I hope I can be an instrument of the Gospel wherever my Lord takes me to next.
If it is His will, let my marketplace also be my mission field and harvest ground =)

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

With Hands Lifted High

My dearest sister Pris won the Topshop/Topman Fresh Graduate Showcase last Saturday!

So happy for her!

You can read all about it by clicking the link to her blog on the left side of your screen.


Sometimes it's very easy to get discouraged in the world.
No matter how hard we try, there's always someone smarter, prettier, wiser, more successful, more talented, the list goes on and on...
So very often we hide our talents, like the servant who buried his one talent in the ground in Jesus' Parable of the Talents (Matthew 25:14-28).

Why bother trying, when we're not gonna make it anyway?

Why bother standing up, only to sit back down in shame?

After all, I am a nobody...


Well, that maybe right...

I am nobody, but my GOD is Somebody you don't wanna mess with!

Sometimes we are so preoccupied with our shortcomings that we miss the point of life... It is not about us, it is all about GOD. He's the One who created us, so we can only find our purpose in Him. After all, only the Creator can tell you why He created something in the first place right?


So what we are to do in life is to use whatever GOD has given us, no matter how little, to multiply and bear fruit. The Lord would surely bless our efforts, and He will say to us, "Well done, my good and faithful servant!"
For if the Lord is with us, who can be against us?
Sometimes when we think we can never hope to succeed, the results surprise us... We get first prize, we get awarded that lucrative contract, we clinch that dream job... When we were sure there's no way we will get noticed.

Why? Not because of us... Surely it is because of who GOD is!

He makes the impossible possible, so we can say together with St. Paul, "Let him who boasts, boasts in the LORD!" (2 Corinthians 10:17)

So whatever we endeavour in life, let us lift our head high and do it to the best of our abilities...
Let us be all that we can be... Always striving with eyes upon the Cross and hands lifted to the sky...
So that when the world looks at us and wonders why... We can just tell them we're loving our KING...


With our hands lifted high, we will worship and sing
With our hands lifted high, we come before You rejoicing
With our hands lifted high, to the sky
When the world wonders why
We'll just tell them we're loving our King!
-- from the song "We Will Worship The Lamb Of Glory" by Dennis Jernigan


Thursday, October 11, 2007

Kidou Senshi Gundam-00, Sanjou!

The wait is over!

At last... the latest entry in the Gundam series!

Rejoice!




Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Discipleship



"Not everyone has the generosity of heart to be a disciple."
-- Anonymous

"There are many followers in the Church. We need more disciples."
-- Archbishop Nicholas Chia

Followers simply follow others.
Disciples are multipliers; they will gather more followers and inspire them to take up discipleship.

Jesus said, "Many are called, but few are chosen."
These chosen ones are those brave enough to give their lives to Jesus and to follow Him as Lord and Teacher. These are disciples, those who choose to deny themselves, to enter the harvest field and build the Kingdom of God.

Disciples are those who seek to receive, to let the Lord fill their cups in order to go out and give to those thirsty for the Love of Christ.
Disciples are those who endure the discipline of Abba Father, to suffer the crucible of pain and humiliation, like gold tempered in fire.
Disciples are those who minister out of their brokenness.
Disciples are those who do not tire of doing good.
Disciples are those who wait upon the Lord.

Do you dare to serve?

Are you a disciple?

Sunday, October 7, 2007

An Offering Of Worship



Any Christian could tell you that King David was the most recognisable worshiper in the Old Testament. The man was responsible for majority of the Psalms, works of thanksgiving and praise to the Most High God that have been sung for generations. Also known for his undignified act of extravagant worship as he danced with all his might in front of the Ark of the Covenent procession, revelling in the marvels of his awesome Creator.

One of the most memorable things David said about worship was this...

"I will not bring before my God that which has cost me nothing."

Praise is a sacrifice.

I guess yesteday's YAM prayer meeting was a sacrifice of praise for me.
I really wanted to go to a BBQ I was invented to attend, for a chance to enjoy good food and great fellowship with brothers & sisters I don't get to see so often. They're a lovely bunch of people and I was really looking forward to seeing them again.

But despite that desire I still volunteered to lead praise & worship as well as to give a talk this weekend at YAM. Somehow I felt that I had to be there to do this.


During the time of sharing at the end, a few of the sisters who attended the prayer meet said that they had a good time of worship, and they really felt the Lord comforting them through the songs. Even my brother who played guitar for me, himself an unquenchable worshiper, shared that this time he felt he could really enter into worship with his music. It was a new experience for him.

One thing I noticed, they were not crediting me for the good time of worship. I praise God for that, for it means I have done what a worship leader was meant to do... Point people to Jesus during worship =)

I sat there and quietly took it all in.
All I could do was give thanks to the Lord, praising Him for using me as His instrument.
Yes, it was His purpose that I was to lead worship at this particular session.
If I had to deny myself by giving up going for the BBQ, then let it be a sacrifice of praise.

For "I will not bring before my God, that which has cost me nothing."


May it be a fragrant offering that brings pleasure to my Father's heart.

Tuesday, October 2, 2007

The Young Saint


Yesterday, Oct. 1st, was the Feast of St. Therese de Lisieux, also known as St. Theresa of the Child Jesus. She was known for her simple, childlike faith and spirituality, truly living out the words of Jesus when He said, "Unless you become like little children, you cannot enter the Kingdom of Heaven."


But what struck me most about her was her age.

She joined the Carmelite Order at age 15, and died of tuberculosis at age 24.

She was a youth, 2 years younger than I am now, yet the Catholic Church recognises her as a Doctor of the Church and a Patron Saint for Missionaries.


Wow..


This young nun shares her titles with great saints such as St. Jerome and St. Francis Xavier.

Many times young people in the Church feel powerless, unworthy or unequipped to serve their community, to accomplish great things for the Lord.

"You're too young, go and study first" or "The youth don't know what they are doing" are words heard spoken by adults within church compounds.


And as youth, so often we believe those words. We let ignorant mindsets and dismissive attitudes limit the wonders of God in our lives. Well, guess what St. Peter preached immediately after he received the Holy Spirit on Pentecost:


"This is what was spoken through the prophet Joel:


'It will come to pass in the last days,' God says,

'That I will pour out a portion of my Spirit upon all flesh.

Your sons and daughters shall prophesy,

your young men shall see visions.' "


We the young people of the Church are empowered by the Spirit of God to proclaim the Good News, to do marvelous deeds in the Name of our Lord Jesus Christ!

The same Holy Spirit who anointed the young St. Theresa in her missionary works are still very much alive and active in us today!


The late Pope John Paul II loved young people. He wanted to see more young Catholics live a life of holiness like St. Theresa. That is why, towards the end of his pilgrimage on earth, he cried out, "My dear young people, do not be afraid to become saints!"


If only we would look beyond ourselves, to trust in the grace of God at work in our lives...

If only we would open our eyes, enlarge our vision to fulfill the dream God has birthed in us...

If only we would embrace the passion of our youth...


How will you answer the words of Jesus in that familiar hymn:


"Will you come and follow Me if I but call your name?"
-- from the hymn "The Summons"


For more on St. Theresa of the Child Jesus, please visit http://www.thereseoflisieux.org/

Saturday, September 29, 2007

Gospel

Bishop Fulton J. Sheen once wrote:

"If I had never been a sinner, I never could call Jesus Saviour."

This is indeed the Gospel, the Good News of our Lord Jesus Christ...
That He came not for the just, but for the sinful.

This is Good News to people who are drawn to Christ but think themselves too sinful to ever be forgiven.

This is Good News to Christians who are plagued by guilt and shame for falling into sin over and over again despite their best efforts.

This is the Good News that we are to preach to the ends of the earth, which we often forget, deeming some people to be too difficult to love.

Lord, thank You for Your Gospel.
I am amazed at how thorough is Your salvation, that when in my ignorance I rejected You and lived as though I don't know You, still You have first loved me and chose to die for me.
Now my life is Yours. Though I may falter and lose hope, let me be an instrument of the Gospel.

I'm not ashamed of the Gospel, Lord.
With Your power & Your love, You saved my soul.
Now I'm alive in You! I live in the Risen Son!
-- from the song "I'm Not Ashamed" by Hillsong

Friday, September 28, 2007

Fighting Dreamer

Monkey D. Luffy.


The man who would become the Pirate King.





Star of the manga & anime series One Piece, Luffy and his crew sails the legendary ocean Grand Line to find the ultimate treasure and to become the strongest pirate in the world, the Pirate King.


Though many pirates generally love to cause chaos by plundering and looting, the author Eiichiro Oda brings up the point that a pirate is essentially just an outcast of society, misunderstood people who don't conform to the majority, seeking a life of fulfilment & adventure, chasing after a dream.

As Christians, don't we feel like outcasts sometimes?

We are in this world but we are not of this world. We seek to not live according to the ways of the world, and that often puts us at odds with the majority, e.g. Most of the young people in the world think that pre-marital sex is perfectly fine as long as both parties consent and "love" each other. What does our faith say about pre-marital sex?

Once some people find out that we are Christians, they view us through their own lens of what Christianity is about... And they question us, make fun of our beliefs, challenge our faith or keep their distance from us.
Yup, a regular day in the life of a pirate =)


Then there's also the element of treasure...

Pirates spend their lives hunting for and storing up treasure. But treasure is not always defined as gold or diamonds.
Luffy's treasure is a strawhat he keeps with him at all times, entrusted by a pirate he greatly admires and seeks to surpass, and the embodiment of his dream to become the Pirate King. For that dream is Luffy's real treasure, his reason to keep on going no matter how tough the obstacles and how deadly the opponents he had to face.

Jesus said, "Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Therefore, store up treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in to steal."
So what is your treasure? Is it passing things like wealth, fame, beauty or career? Or is it seeking to bring pleasure to the heart of God?

When we were born, God put in each of us a vision... A purpose He wants to fulfill in our lives.
That becomes a dream so huge, we think we are crazy for even daring to think of it. That is the God-given dream, a vision that shall come to pass as long as we put our trust in the Lord and keep on working towards it no matter what obstacles stand in our way.

What is the dream that God has put in your heart?


Another theme in One Piece is the idea that your friends are your treasure.
Luffy's crew each sail with him to pursue their own dreams, and their personalities are so extreme that they bicker and clash a lot, but when trouble comes knocking they risk life and limb for each other. They stand by each other no matter how impossible the odds may seem.





Same goes for our Christian community. The Lord wants us to love Him by loving each other.
Sure we may offend each other from time to time, sometimes not by intention but simply because we are created differently. Do we stand by each other when the going gets tough?
Ha ha.. Yup, we are the crew of Captain Jesus... and we raise His Name high as our bannner!


Luffy is a fighting dreamer... He's so convicted of his purpose that he fights to see it become reality.


I wanna be a fighting dreamer too, believing that I will see my God-given dream come to pass.

But I do not want to become any kind of King.

I have a King, and He is the King of Kings!


"In the presence of a thousand kings, You are my one desire..."

-- from the song "Be Glorified" by Chris Tomlin

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Lady Rain




"Lady Rain... I hear you at my window..."


As I was blogging this, that old song by Indecent Obsession came to my mind.

Kinda love that old tune... Some of you reading this might not even have heard of that song before eh? Ha ha... I must be getting older.


I was woken up at 5 am by the pitter patter of rain on my window.

"Praise the Lord", I thought. He made it rain now instead of later so we can carry on with our plan to go to Sentosa.


8.30 am


My alarm rang and I opened my eyes... and I can still hear the rain drops on my window.

Messages start to come in from the rest of the gang...

So how?

Raining lei...

Plan B?

Shall we wait?


I dwelled on that thought for a moment... Shucks, we cannot go Sentosa. There goes our plan.

So I lingered on it a moment longer... But then I decided to praise the Lord anyway.

It's a nice beautiful weather.

And my friends sounded determined to still meet each other... Ha ha... Yeah, it's the company that matters more than anything.


Our day out turned into a chill out session at a sister's place.

But no matter, my heart is still filled with joy. And I just know God is showering His love upon all of us at this moment.



It's going to be a beautiful, rainy day.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007



Twenty-three.


My favourite number.


23.


The day of my birth.


XXIII.


One of the most beautiful Psalms ever written.


10 + 10 + 3


His Airness.. the great Jordan.


Dua puluh tiga.


My age when Jesus came to my rescue... and my life was never the same again.

As this little fact of life hit me yesterday, I realise what a sweet thing my Heavenly Father has done for me.

I ever wondered, why didn't God bring me to the Youth in the Spirit Seminar when I was younger? That way I would come to know Him earlier and would have more years to serve Him in ministry...


I've come to realise many reasons for that since then, and I praise God for His wonderful works.

But this has to be the cutest reason of them all...

He called me to Him at age 23, my favourite number... So now that number will be a special number for Him and me... the age when the wayward son returned.


"I once was lost, but now am found..."


"Was blind, but now I see."




Tuesday, September 25, 2007

God's Greatest Plan




"God's greatest plan for His Son... Was to die on the Cross."


Thanks to brother Daniel for sharing that very sobering sentence.

Sometimes in my zeal, it is so easy to think that I would give my life to serve God and do great things for Him.

It may sound very noble but often the "I" stands out more than it should.

Sometimes when people tell me that they see me doing awesome works for God's Kingdom, it is easy to envision grand things... a stage, a big crowd... though these may indeed be what is to come, but is it really how the Lord defines "awesome works"?


After all, the grand plan of the salvation of humanity was accomplished in the most inhuman way possible... the King of Majesty unjustly accused, scourged, paraded as a criminal and His naked body finally nailed to the Cross for all the world to see.

Yup... that's God's greatest plan for Jesus Christ... the redemption of the whole world.


Lord, help me to not look to the future til I forget the present reality... For here I am, a servant who thinks more highly of himself than he probably should. For now I am, a "leader" who really needs You to tell him how to proceed and where to go.

Father, thank You for teaching me everyday... that when I think I am wise, I may be a fool. That when I think I am right, I may be wrong. That when I think I am justified, I may be judging.

Spirit, thank You for Your gentleness & Your patience... Help me to surrender my will to You more and more. Amen.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

God's Rhinos



Some of you who have seen the links in my blog might have wondered


"Huh, what are these Rhinos for God?"


Well, they are...


Rhino no.1 - Mervin Prakash

Rhino no.5 - Clement Chua

Rhino no.7 - Daniel Sim

Rhino no.69 - Wilfred Chua


A band of brothers from Zion's Joy, a youth ministry based in the Immaculate Heart of Mary Church.


I got to know Daniel when Zion's Joy (affectionately called ZJ, according to them) attended their first SACCRE Youth meeting at the beginning of the year. I was immediately drawn by his openness in sharing, passion for God and clear enthusiasm to be part of the Youth Wing of the Catholic Charismatic Renewal in Singapore.

I went to help for one of the days when ZJ organised a Youth Empowered in the Spirit! Camp (or YES! Camp.. man, they are good with these catchy names huh?) and got to know the other Rhinos.

Since then, through our fellowship in outings and SACCRE events, I've come to admire & respect these fine young men, with their fiery passion for God & the building of His Kingdom.


Before I met them, I used to wonder if I'm crazy for charging everywhere to serve in various camps, churches & ministries in many different ways... I just cannot stop going for my God, so captivated am I by the Glory that is Yahweh & the Awesomeness that is Jesus, His Son.


Guess what, not only have my four brothers been at it longer than I have, they have even come up with a term for what they do.. being Rhinos for God.

But being Rhinos isn't all about charging blindly... They have come to learn that even Rhinos need some downtime, to graze in the pasture that the Lord leads them too... (think Psalm 23)
Right, guys? =)


Why God's Rhinos, you might ask? Not something more majestic like Eagles, or more magnificent like Lions? Well, I'll let the originators tell the story themselves... Go dig up the archives in their blog through the link on the left side of your screen.


If you're reading this, guys, thanks for your friendship, honest sharing, encouragements & affirmations... It's been a joy to serve with you, and I feel confident we can accomplish great things for our God, charging alongside each other... =)


Something I found on the net, to remind you guys that no matter how garang a Rhino can be... In God's loving eyes, You're still His bundles of joy.... ;)


"Aww... So cuuuttteee!" -- God

P.S. Mario Chua, if you're reading this too... You may not call yourself a Rhino, but you're no less mighty a servant in God's Kingdom! Cheers to you too, bro!

It Is Okay...



Lord, I can't do this alone!

He says, "That's right, now you're getting there. Not by strength, not by might, but by MY Spirit."

Lord, I don't have all the answers!

He says, "Well, you don't need to. That's why you have these people around you, right? Let me speak through them too."

I felt the Lord calling me to sit nearer to Him, so I approached the Blessed Sacrament.
Oh the joy to sit at the feet of my Master!
Jesus whispered, "As you come before me, you have been washed clean... Your garments now white as snow."

Thanks, Gav, Jane, Becky & Pris...
For reminding me that I'm not alone in this...
Thank you for your love for our Cell, thank you for your affirmation...

Thanks, Gav, for reaffirming me that I should be myself... It is okay.

For the Lord says, "Come as you are..."

Monday, September 17, 2007

'Great Expectations'

Now that You're near

Everything is different, everything's so different, Lord

I know I'm not the same, my life You've changed

I wanna be with You, I wanna be with You


I love this song...

I love it because I know it to be true. Ever since the day I received the Holy Spirit in 2004, I know that I'm not the same person inside. Something HAS changed, though I couldn't put my finger on it. But I know for sure that I'm different... for everything the Lord touches, He made new.


I've come a ways since then... The Lord had to humble me, break me, sent people & events to teach me difficult lessons... But it's all worth it, for we are like gold tested in fire. Trials & tribulations serve only to make us more & more into the person God intended us to be.


But at times it seems as though no matter how much I've changed it is still not enough.
No matter how I try to be more patient & understanding, people say I'm overbearing.
No matter how I try to be more gentle with my words, people say they don't like my manner of speech.

Sometimes it feels like I wanna just say.. Enough is enough.

I am a work in progress... If the Lord is taking His time with me, then the rest of them would just have to learn to live with it!




Expectations...

Society expects something of me.
My parents expect something of me.
My friends expect something of me.
The Church expects something of me.
It's not possible to meet all of those expectations.. especially when some contradict the other.


How much should I care what people say of me?


How much should I conform to what 'they' expect of me and how much should I just be myself?


I guess another reminder to always turn to Jesus and seek Him above all else.
To seek counsel from the Lord and not just rely on human wisdom.
To find rest in Him, for His yoke is easy and His burden light (Matthew 11:29-30).


Yes, we are not meant to carry the weight of the world, the load of all those expectations...
And certainly never to carry it alone...

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Island Life... Love it!

Sentosa... Here we come!


Surf... Sand... Sun...

Nothing quite like a day at the beach with great friends.


The day may begin with a downpour, but Abba Father sure turned the sun back on with a vengeance! Shiok ah! Got the burns to prove it too... hahaha


Went to Sentosa on Saturday with brothers & sisters from St Joseph's Church Kanektas.. (Connectors.. get it?) to celebrate the success of the confirmation camp last weekend. The greatest joy in ministry is to see lives transformed by the love of Christ and the power of His Spirit.


Really had a blast... just wasting the day away; lazing around in the waters, tossing a ball around or a frisbee, laughing and making merry all the way. There's a certain liberation to know you're wasting time on the beach, and loving every minute of it! Indeed in the hectic Singapore lifestyle there's always something to do next. We finish something, there's always another thing waiting and we hop to it, no time to be taking it easy... Easy to forget that life's about the journey, not the destination.


Even more true for those of us who are in Christ Jesus...




Because He made a stand on the Cross, our final destination is certain... One way ticket to Heaven. What God likes is to enjoy the journey with us, walking with us on this earth one day at a time.
Picture this... How are you gonna answer when you come face to face with God one day and He asks you..


"So, did you enjoy My Creation? I made it especially for you..."

=)

Yupp... Would like to have days like this in the future. A day off, just to savour the beauty of God's handiwork in the company of people He has blessed my life with...


One of those days where I truly thank God I'm alive...


The feeling that, whatever it is I have to do next, it can wait...

Now, THAT's heaven on earth...




Thursday, September 13, 2007

Quo Vadis Domine


Quo Vadis.. the name of a small chapel outside of Rome.

Tradition has it that at this place St. Peter encountered the Lord Jesus once again, towards the end of his life. The great apostle was trying to avoid capture by the people persecuting Christianity when Jesus appeared to him. Dumbfounded, St. Peter uttered this question...



"Quo vadis Domine?"



"Where are you going, Lord?"



Then came the reply... "I am going to Rome to be crucified."



At that moment, Peter knew the time had come for him to give up his life for the sake of the Name. He surrendered himself to the authorities in Rome who had him put to death on the cross. This once cowardly fisherman boldly requested to be crucified upside down... "For I am not worthy to be crucified in the same manner as my Lord."



As my brother Daniel from Zion's Joy shared this story inside the adoration room of the Church of St. Bernadette, I felt a touch of the Spirit in my heart. We, along with the leaders of SACCRE Youth, were gathered there for a time of discernment for the next part of the year.
Yet all I could feel were the words of St. Peter echoing in my heart...

"Quo vadis Domine?"


"Where are you going, Lord?"


I felt the Lord inviting me to ask that question, to ask Him where He is going in my life.
For an Apostle is really someone who lives his life following the footsteps of the Lord Jesus.
It was an invitation to surrender... something not that easy to do, and something I'm still learning to do. It was a call to obedience... no matter what the cost.

"Quo vadis Domine?"

I felt tears in my eyes, as I come to the full realisation of those words...


"Where are you going, Lord?"


Tell me where you are going in my life, so I can follow you even if it means going somewhere I'd rather not go. Kinda frightening thought... But I'm in too deep, my life is no longer my own, and there's no turning back.
From my heart, I cried out...

"Lord, I surrender."

I knew it was a decision I'd probably have to make over and over again in my life, but at that moment I put all fear aside and said those words in my heart.
For an instant I felt the weight of the cross... But as soon as I felt it, two strong hands lifted that weight and shouldered my cross with me. Jesus will be with me, every step of the way.

There's something great in store for me, something that would require me to give more of myself. I do not comprehend, but then again, in the business of Kingdom building, obedience comes before understanding =)

The journey of discipleship is long and tiring, but it is worth every mile...
With my Lord at my side.




Sunday, September 9, 2007

Love Almighty

I was having dinner with my parents when TCS 5 happened to be showing an old Jim Carrey movie called "Bruce Almighty". You can check out what the movie is about by clicking this link:



I've watched this movie once upon a time in the cinema but tonight somehow I felt like watching it again, to see what points the film makers wanted to make on the subject of Faith.





There was this scene when Carrey's character Bruce was having a conversation with God (played by Morgan Freeman) after using the power of the Almighty for selfish gains, causing chaos in his hometown of Buffalo, NY and ultimately driving away the woman he loves.

In frustration, Bruce said...


"How do you make someone love you without affecting free will?"



That line really got me thinking.
When God created humanity, He gave us free will. He gave us the POWER to choose.
And since then He has done everything to win our love, even when that meant sending His own beloved Son, Jesus Christ, to be executed for our sins... For what is sin really, other than the choices we make to go against God & all the goodness that He stands for?


The Lord God said, in Isaiah 43:4...
"Since you are precious and honoured in my sight, and because I love you, I will give men in exchange for you, and nations in exchange for your life."


Yes, my friends, God so desires to reconcile us to Himself that He would pierce His own heart in order to do so... because that was exactly what happened at Calvary, as He watched the battered, blood soaked body of Jesus being nailed to the cross by our hands.


Our hands... Yours and mine.
Because it was for our transgressions that the Sinless One had to die. He took our place so that we may live, and come to know how much God loves us.


As I reflected on that question, I can only think of one way to make someone love me without affecting free will; And that is to simply LOVE that person. I just have to love that person without having any guarantee that he or she would return my love.
And that's exactly what God does. He simplys LOVES us, unconditionally.
The God who could turn sea into dry land would not force us to love Him back.



Why?


Because, as St. Paul wrote this in his first letter to the Corinthians, chapter 13, verses 4-7:


"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."


That is why the Lord waits patiently for us to return His love... Like a lovesick man tirelessly doing all kinds to win the love of his dream woman; buying her flowers, making her chicken soup when she has a cold, planning a surprise for her birthday, etc. ... In the same way God pursues us with His own inimitable ways; painting a beautiful morning sky to brighten our day, stopping the rain when we forget our umbrellas, making sure our bus comes as soon as we reach the bus stop so we don't have to be late for work/school, and countless other things everyday.


Because ultimately, love is also a CHOICE.


The question is: are we too focused on our own hurts and worries to notice God's hand in our lives? Are we so bent on looking out for me, myself & I that we ignore the people God puts in our path to show us His love? Are we too busy looking up for a big sign, when God is performing small miracles all around us daily?


Are we going to choose to accept the wonderful love that God is freely offering us?



Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Rescue





"I need You, Jesus... To come to my rescue..."


As I listen to that song by Jared Anderson, I was reminded of a very real truth...


I need Jesus to rescue me...


To rescue me from sin... because I fall again and again. Because it is so hard to choose God's truth in the face of temptation. Because it is so easy to put myself first, especially when the more loving decision was also the harder one to make.


To rescue me from myself... because it so easy to just do it my way, when I'm supposed to let the Lord tell me what He wants me to do. Because I try to do things with my own strength, when the Lord says, "Not by strength, nor by power, but by My Spirit." (Zechariah 4:6)
Because sometimes I forget that the "servant" comes first in "servant-leader".
Because it is easy to run ahead of the flock and forget that passion needs to be tempered with compassion.


Yes... it is so easy to let negativity set in. One word said in anger can undo years of kindness and friendship. A small setback can send us retreating into our dark corner, forgetting the work of God's love in our lives.


Or be so full of ourselves we cannot see that it was Jesus who brought us to where we are... So easy to lapse into this mentality when things are going well.


Yes... sometimes we can be so caught up in what we are doing that we do not realise we are sinking in the choppy waters of life. That we can walk on water only on the foundation of faith, a gift from Heaven, not by our own achievements or abilities.


Or when we think we are close to God, but we are actually not as close to Him as we think.


But praise God for reminders that come our way, through a song for example... =)


So Lord, remind me to always look to you... even if You have to tell me everyday.
Help me to be able to humbly acknowledge... I need You, Jesus, to come to my rescue.

Monday, September 3, 2007

Rejoice That Your Names Are Writte In Heaven

It is a joy to serve the Lord.
It brings a warm feeling into the heart when I see people touched by the love of God, even more amazing when I was the instrument to minister that love.

There's also a great feeling of togetherness when serving with brothers & sisters who are similarly on fire with passion for our Creator. The love of Christ & the fellowship of the Holy Spirit has a way of bringing people together... It is a bond of more than just friendship; we are siblings in Christ =)

On the way back, this verse came to mind though... Luke 10:20 (Ok la, I confess, I had to look up that verse online... I can't recall offhand where exactly in the Bible Jesus said the following words...):

However, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names are written in heaven.

It just reminds that the joy of fellowship, the awe at having experienced the power of God moving through us and the warm fuzzy feeling of seeing lives touched by the Spirit and a myriad of other sensations that comes from doing the Lord's work are just the perks...

The real reward comes when we humbly acknowledge that all the glory goes to Jesus.
Even as we revel in the perks, we should always come back to the foot of the Cross.
We are merely doing what servants ought to do, Lord, You deserve all the glory.. For we are merely instruments, it was You who was working through us.

The true joy comes from knowing that we have brought pleasure to the heart of Jesus with our little acts of service & obedience...

Luke 10:
21At that time Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit, said, "I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure."

Indeed, serving the Lord is a reward unto its own... =)

"Blessed are the eyes that see what you see. For I tell you that many prophets and kings wanted to see what you see but did not see it, and to hear what you hear but did not hear it."
-- Luke 10:23-24

This post is dedicated to YAM's Marlene & Eugene, the ever remarkable Rhinos for God (Prakash, Wilfred & Daniel), ZJ's Ryan & the dedicated Cathecists of St. Stephen's Church & their families (your faith has touched our hearts)

Saturday, September 1, 2007

The Inner Hollow

Those of you familiar with the manga/anime series BLEACH would undoubtedly be well acquainted with its main protagonist, Kurosaki Ichigo.

Though he is a good guy with a heart that wants to protect the innocent, there is a dark side to his soul.. Don't we all? But the difference being in Ichigo's case, that dark side has a mind of its own... Sinister eh?
You see, there's a Hollow living inside Ichigo.

In the world of BLEACH, Hollows are evil spirits who prey on human souls -- essentially the bad guys of the series lah. And this Hollow would usurp control over Ichigo's body in his moments of weakness... going on a berserker rampage and posing a threat to everyone around.


I can relate to that... Often I feel as if there is another 'me' inside, the one that drives me to do things I know I should not be doing as a child of God.

As St. Paul says in his letter to the Romans chapter 7...
17As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.

Many times after I've committed a sin, it felt like i've "snapped out" of a spell. And it feels terrible as I realise, "Oh nuts, what have I done?"
And other times, I know I could have stopped myself, but my sinful nature pressed me to go ahead and commit sin anyway... Such moments leave a bitter aftertaste, the feelings of shame, guilt & self reproach... Felt like spiritual schizophrenia; on one hand I'm on fire to serve God, but on the other, so easily I give in to temptation.

And that's precisely what the devil wants, for us to turn away from God precisely when we need Him the most, to forgive us and pick us up on our feet again. Like the Hollow filling Ichigo's mind with the fear that he is too weak to resist, and that soon the evil inside would consume him completely...

Seems like all is lost... but is it?

It is, as long as we rely on our strength & willpower to resist temptation, to do something we are not meant to do alone. That is why Jesus gave us the Paraclete, His Holy Spirit to be our partner so that we can accomplish what we cannot on our own efforts.
The challenge is to name our fears... to face the darkness within and acknowledge our sinfulness. As we begin to see ourselves for who we are, we can then learn to see ourselves as God sees us; His beloved sons & daughters, made in His image and lavishly showered with His eternal love & infinite mercy.
As we bring our sins into the light, submit to God and say that we cannot be righteous by our own efforts, then He can heal us... and we will know how true is His promise in Romans 8:1, that "there shall be no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus."

Ichigo too had to come out of his denial, that there is a very real darkness lurking within. He made the decision to face his fear... and it is at this time that he encountered a group of others like him, humans with great spiritual powers but had Hollows living inside them. These newfound friends trained him to control his inner Hollow, to eventually subdue it and came out stronger than ever before.


It is similar in our spiritual walk, we need a Christian community to belong to. Since the beginning of creation in Genesis, God never intended man to be alone. We need to be accountable to others... to encourage us to be better, to comfort us when we fall and to share in the knowledge that we are not alone in our struggles, that the people around us also face struggles in their lives.

That is why Jesus said that the Church is a body, for together we are better than the sum of our parts. Together we can achieve what none of us can accomplish on our own. May the Holy Spirit continue to empower us every day against the works of sin in our lives.

Venturing Into A New Realm...

Right.. Finally I created a blog.
It's 3 am in the morning in Singapore.
I guess the desire for self expression must be met...

But, it's my story for His glory.
I'm hoping that as I pen down my thoughts, reflections, experiences or random stuff, God will seem that little bit more real... to me, to you, whoever reads these writings.

Just which God exactly am I referring to?
When I talk about God, there's only one that I acknowledge as Lord of my life..

YAHWEH

The God of Israel; the One who so loved the world, He gave His one & only Son... So that whoever believes in Him, may not perish, but have life everlasting (John 3:16).
This I believe to be true... For He has rescued me from the directionless wandering that was my life, to a life of purpose.

What is my purpose in life?
Well, it is still unfolding... but I know one thing for sure; I live not only for myself but for the glory of Him who has called me out of darkness and into His marvelous light.
Beats living for myself when I sure dunno what's gonna happen tomorrow... might as well go with the Man with the Plan.. haha =)

I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you; Plans to give you a future full of hope. -- Jeremiah 29:11